tales of horror

So the other night Andy and I were driving around (my laptop hard drive pooped out so we went shopping for a new one . . . anyways that's not important to the story) and of course right at the freeway entrance I get stopped at the longest stoplight of all time.

We're sitting there for a minute or so when a large black SUV pulls up behind us . . . and this car is just BLARING the worst most annoying kind of R&B . . . my poor little car is shaking--the bass is turned up so high that i have to slap my hands over my ears to keep them from bleeding.

I'm getting progressively more pissed off bcz the light still isn't changing, and start casting dirty looks through my rearview mirror towards the unidentifiable person in the SUV behind me.

Then suddenly, as if on cue, the SUV inches forward--just enough for me to see the unidentifiable person in the red glow of my brake lights---and to my utter horror i see THIS:

me: "HOLY FUCK! IT'S A CLOWN!!!!"

Andy: "wha. . .?" *looks behind* "OH MY GOD!!!! HE'S WAVING AT ME!!!"

me: "oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit . . ."

Andy: "GREEN LIGHT!!! GO GO GOOOO!!!!"

me: *slams gas pedal to the floor*

Together: "AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!"


Amazingly we survived, due to a lack of governance over speeding laws in California (unless you're black or hispanic--in which case it doesn't matter if you're speeding or not) and frequent changing of lanes.

It's life and death situations like these that really make you realize the value of life. In that instant when I peeled away from the intersection, all the times in my life where I'd thought "what's the point of living?" flashed before my eyes,

and I knew that I wanted to live.